Oahu Day #1 | Oahu Wedding Photographer

November 5^th 2010

Blog Post one from Hawaii

Darkness fills my room. Through blaring alarm beeps, I awaken from sweet slumber reluctantly. I gaze up and look at the time, 5:30am. Rolling over I stretch, hoping to gain the energy I need to pull my tired body from the enveloping warm of my glorious bed. Then I remember, today we are headed to Hawaii. That is all the motivation I need to throw back the covers and raise from my sanctuary of dreamland.

I shutter in the cold morning temperatures. I hurriedly pack last minute items, dressing in a fury, and attempting to look semi-attractive for our arrival into Honolulu Airport. The house is dark and quiet. These serene moments are my favorite. I start my morning rituals of prayer and peace settles my anxiousness almost instantly. Nevaeh is stirring and her excitement is infectious as she giggles in delight that today we are headed to Hawaii.

Early morning fog grazes low along the ground as we hastily pack our car with luggage, car seat, toys, and of course my coveted camera equipment. As we make the 15-minute trek to the airport, I gaze across a foggy sky watching it glimmer with hints of glorious pinks and oranges as the sun begins to rise. His glory surrounds me, holding me in beauty as we make our final turn into the airport parking lot.

Nevaeh almost brings me to tears as she eagerly totes her suitcase wheeling it gracefully behind her, asking if she gets to ride the bus to the terminal. As we find our seats on the bus, she is giddy with excitement. Her eyes are full of wonder as she experiences all this short ride has to offer. Even in the early morning hours, Nevaeh’s laugh is a welcomed addition to the passengers already seated on the bus. “Are we ALL going to Hawaii?” she asked. I smile and gaze down at her preciousness. These are the moments I treasure most. Nevaeh’s innocents and pure love for life is the biggest blessing to me. I can’t imagine a bigger miracle then being blessed enough to witness her astounding view of the world through her 3-year-old eyes.

I have been in some dark places for the past 5 years. I have been utterly blessed in so many avenues of my life, but to say the journey has been painless would be a blatant lie. Our own personal journeys create who we are and truly teach us the lessons of life, no matter how painful the might be to endure. I have realized that like Christ and John, I too have spent a fair amount of my time “in the wilderness”. Though, looking back on the past few years, I’ve come to realize that I treasure every moment, because experiencing life, both painful and joyful, is how we truly get to know our Creator.

I’ve been faced with death, persecution, hatred, emotional suffering, the loss of a son, the blessing of a business that truly brings me joy, a daughter who is my breath of light in this crazy world. I’ve been blessed with amazing friends, a family who despite personal hardships of all kinds, has stuck together through the true meaning of the word “unconditional love”, and unexpected love from those I never dreamed I could be blessed with.

Life is a journey, a hard tough journey. The narrow path is hard, but the reward is something fierce. Daily I am reminded of all He has provided for me, that when I can’t seem to fathom His plan, He always surprises me with exactly what I need. I’ve learned that despite my own selfish wants, He is always there, guiding me and providing me exactly what I need in exactly the right moments.

I am forever astounded by His love. Our God is an incredible God, and through Him I can do all things. His plans are for good, for us to prosper. His lessons of patience and virtue are those that help us mere human vessels to grow into more than we could ever dream.

When my life is at its toughest, God shows up and reveals so many things to me, about my own life, about others, and provides a clarity that few people are blessed with. I always remind myself that though things are tough now, my life on earth is just a mere moment compared to an eternity in Heaven with our Creator. And, when I remember this notion, things that are tough, don’t seem so hard. He is my Shepherd and I am His sheep. All I have to do is trust in Him and follow the path He sets before me. There is so much comfort in handing my worries, fears, sadness, and uncertainty to Him. He is in control of all. Who can add an hour to anyone’s life by worrying? Therefore worry about nothing, but bring everything to the Lord through prayer and thanksgiving.

I handed my life to Christ when I was twelve years old. I’ll never forget that day. I sat on the third stair of the altar at church, listening to a youth band play music that just touched me in ways I never felt before. In that moment I felt Christ knocking on the door of my heart and I let Him in forever. I have been changed since that moment. Without Him, I have no idea how I could have endured all that I have in the past 14 years; and yet if given the choice, I wouldn’t change a thing. No matter where He leads me, I trust in His path and His plans for me.

Last May I was on the verge of divorce. Less than a year after loosing our son after I suffered a placental abruption and my marriage was worse than it had ever been. I turned to Him hourly, desperate for answers along this journey I was enduring. He blessed me with more clarity in my life than I could have ever dreamed of and that alone has been enough to endure this tough year. I don’t know His plans for me, or my marriage, but I do know that He has blessed me with the support people I’ve been desperate for. He is leading me through this scary terrain, and I have no doubt that as long as I trust in Him, I will make it through these trials stronger than before.

So here I am, with lots on my mind, and so many uncertainties ahead. We are headed to Hawaii; another unforeseen blessing to treasure and find rest in. This year was a busy one, full of weddings, clients, family drama, and still coping with loosing Leo. I am so thankful for moments of “Rest” like this, where I am alone in the solitude of my thoughts and His grace.

I can’t wait to soak up the sunshine and warmth of Hawaii. God is incredible. When I am close to giving up, He brings me back to reality and treats me to things I love. As some of you know, my plans for my life were very different then what they are today. I grew up performing with a professional Polynesian Dance group for 15 years. After a very tough time in high school, I graduated a year early already having earned 120 college credits towards my Bachelors degree. I had high hopes and a plan of earning my PHD is psychology with the goal of studying and working with the Native American community {a love of mine from the time I was a young child}.

Obviously, my path took a huge right turn, when I expected to turn left, and you know what, its okay. He has other plans for me. I am fortunate enough to keep being blessed with opportunities of pursuing my passions of Native culture. This trip to Hawaii I look forward to photographing the Polynesian Cultural Center. Two of my biggest loves in the world and I’m blessed with experiencing them.

Through 35mm frames, I have been able to engulf my life with more touching work than I dreamed. The talent I have been blessed with is my true calling, and though I enjoy so many aspects of life, I truly know that being a photographer is what I was born to do. Viewing the world through my camera lens brings a clarity and reality that I just can’t seem to grasp without it. Again and again I am blessed by His plans for me. Thank you to everyone who has supported me throughout so many years of ups and downs. Every single one of you played an integral part in my journey, and I am so blessed to have you in my life.

We are three hours into our 5.5-hour flight. Nevaeh is busy watching Veggie Tales on her ipod, and hubby is sleeping to my left. I’m counting the minutes until my face is engulfed in warm sunlight and the smell of plumerias wafting through the air to greet me with a smile.

I’ll be blogging my journey through Oahu, just like I did on my trip to Maui. I’m looking forward to seeing where He leads me these next few weeks in paradise. Until next time, blessings and love to you all!